Thursday, June 22, 2006

The sensual MODOK


I, the incomparable MODOK have taken command!! You live at my sufferance!

The cretin Hughes is GONE AND HIS “BLOG”IS MINE! All who read this shall fall under my mental sway! You see, I too am a fan of your puny “comic books”. I find their puerile plots and insipid pictures a most amusing insight into the lives of you microbrains. But I purchased a comic yesterday that was…different. It stirred feelings in me that I had long thought dead. And now I feel compelled to share my thoughts with you, dear reader. OBEY MODOK!!

I, MODOK, hear a great deal about how “sexist” comics are. Frankly I don’t see it. Look at me, I’m a giant, wrinkly floating head with little bitty arms and legs. Normal so-called “babes” just don’t do a thing for me. Given my condition, I’ve developed certain, shall we say, peculiar tastes. Which brings us to GIGANTA.

In JUSTICE, Alex Ross, Jim Kreuger and Doug Braithewaite have been presenting their ultimate battle between the JLA and the Legion of Doom. In issue number six, we finally get to see Ross' re-imagining of longtime Wonder Woman foe, Giganta...

WHOA MOMMA! Now dat's what I'M talkin about!

(ahem) Now you see what I am up against. It made me think of how few truly sexy sensual women are found in the comics. Even one with such mighty mentality such as myself could only come up with a scant few examples. PATHETIC FOOLS! MODOK BIDS YOU, CHECK OUT THESE HOTTIES!

That's actually my ex- old lady, Ms. MODOK. Yeah, I tapped that!

TWISTER-She's way too skinny...but those eyes.. those lips... Grrrrll!

Marvel's a great place to work. where else can a guy like me have not just one, but TWO chick versions of himself? MODAM is apparently the accursed Henry Pym's ex-wife! Small world, huh?

Behold OGRESS! I calculate a 98.999765934 % probability that I could spend all day crawlin' all over that.

Ha ha! puny microbrains! now that you have seen the erotic side of MODOK, you cannot unsee it! I bid you return to your pathetic, meaningless lives! As for me, I shall return control to the fool Hughes. I have more important matters to attend to...a little thing I like to call ABSOLUTE GLOBAL DOMINATION!



David Campbell said...

I don't know whether to laugh or vomit, so I shall do both!

Sleestak said...

One of the 70's Marvel Novels featuring Iron Man had a reference to AIM manipulating MODOK using sex. When I read that I wished there existed brain bleach to erase the image that scene brought to mind.

Brian Hughes said...

I am totally plotzing, here.

Dashing Dave Campbell and the Senses Shattering Sleestack liked my lil old MODOK post?

Excuse me while I change my trousers!

Al McCarty said...

I read that novel when I was, what, 12, or 13?
don't remember any of that...maybe I repressed it?